Do you remember we went to a wedding in mid March this year? My DIL took this photo of DH and SMIL. About a week later he kindly forwarded the photos he took to the rest of the family to keep everyone in touch. It was a small wedding & therefore not everyone could be invited. Soon afterwards I received this from my SIL's DH (my BIL but not dear "Uncle Dorian" of layout fame...) It was about the same time that this was posted onto BIL's FACEBOOK WALL!!!
I left a comment under it, on Facebook, saying "BTW that was in Joburg & did you know dad has just joined Facebook?" Dad being both of our "dad-in-law". He had not just joined Facebook. I just said that to give BIL a little "skrik" (fright) & perhaps set the wheels of thought into motion as to whether this was really an appropriate photo to be showing on a rather public platform. My thinking was that it was inappropriate because it was disrespectful of my SMIL, who is well into her 70's & suffering from Alzheimer's disease. She used to be an immaculately groomed woman. Now she is still elegant & refined. I KNOW that she would NOT have found this funny some years back, when she had the wherewithall to fight back.
I discovered some weeks later (not being a daily FB user...) that BIL had deleted me from his Friends list. I was searching through my Friends list to send him a birthday message. I double & triple checked...yup, no longer "friends".... I sent him a birthday message care of my SIL instead. Since then I have e mailed her twice (with regard to other matters) & casually mentioned that I would appreciate it if BIL could please contact me if there was a reason for deleting me, as I suggested that it was perhaps accidental??? No comment. We still communicate regularly (my dear SIL & myself) but my query just does not get mentioned.
This week (Monday) I sent BIL another friends request. I included a message - something along the lines of "Hi BIL! I see that you have deleted me off your friends list. Was this perhaps accidental? If not could you please be kind enough to let me know the reason." I don't think this is unreasonable. After all we are "family" so we can't ever really be rid of each other permanently. We are both outspoken, but I am prepared to agree to disagree on certain matters.
Not only have I waited over 2 months for an explanation (since the beginning of the whole affair) but the saga continues...BIL decided (very soon after my comment & subsequent boot into cyberspace...) that DIL SHOULD join Facebook! As DIL (& SMIL) spend part of their time in the same country & province as BIL (& SIL!) , BIL got DIL all registered & set to go on their next dinner get-together. Oh, and apparently showed him (& her I presume...) the photo on his wall (wonder if my comment was still there or if he had removed it...) Apparently DIL laughed. I heard this via SIL. Personally I can't invisage DIL laughing genuinely (IOW finding it genuinely amusing) to have his wife compared to this
but, then again, I could be wrong! Perhaps it is truly hilarious to have your ailing wife compared to Ghandi...
DIL has since required help, which I have given him, with FB, as he was writing messages intended for personal consumption only onto people's FB walls. He had not been shown where the inbox was. Need I say more? Naturally I am slightly apprehensive regarding this post, hence the many weeks of delay. I was hoping to have some light thrown on the subject by BIL but it seems that my questions are going to be left unanswered, so I can only presume that it was NOT an accident & that my comment was the reason. Do you think that my comment was harsh/too harsh or not harsh enough???!!! Do I need to grow a sense of humour? 'Cos you know, I really thought I had one, I just thought I was supposed to use it to laugh WITH people & not AT them.